I Don't Know What's Worse...

It's been a while since I've blogged, and my last posting was anything but chipper, so I feel like it's time to redeem myself. Afterall, I've gotten stuck on the help desk with late shift 4 nights this week, might as well kill the last hour of my incredibly long work week by blogging about uselessness.
So, here it is kids, take a deep breath and digest my find. I came across this jewel on my friend Nate's facebook page, and so I stole the photo and got a burst of energy to "pound" on the keyboard. No pun intened. Pfftthh, who am I kidding, of course that jab was filled 'to the brim' with pun :)


Now, there are two very disturbing things to this girl's facebook posting. The first being blatently obvious, and that is the apparent fact that she is a complete moron for not realizing she was typing back/forth with her friends about her lady parts being "split" (as she so eloquently described it.) The second is something that only came to me when I read over it a second time (obviously still in disbelief.) If you look closely, (in the second blurb down) the last phrase says "i figured gma would have told you by now."
Now, where I come from gma translates to none other than every family's favorite female senior citizen--aka Grandma. And well that's just freakin' weird! Perhaps gma stands for someone's initials, but it seems that 'K' doesn't give much thought to being coy, so I have to lean towards the obvious translation. I can openly admit that I am not super tight with my grandma, and even if we were BFF's, there is no freakin' way in hell I would tell my grandma about my riding my boyfriend so roughly to the point that, yes...I tore my vagine. Who does that? I mean honestly, I may use that phrase like I use brownies to fight off PMS (which is often incase you didn't know it.) but seriously folks WTF!!??

Now, no good blog from Mel would be complete without a little addition from the mind of Cowboy Curtis...

1) People are idiots.
2) Who would share that kind of info, especially in writing (of any sort)?
3) Split from falling off? Onto what, a fencepost?

Ack, just looked at the clock, only 5:24, which means I have 36 minutes to go, although the phone has not ran once in the last hour. Maybe I need to find something else to blog about...stay tuned.

Love your life and your "broken" lady parts-
Mel