Would You Mind If I Borrowed Your Underwear ??!

Most of you know about a month and a half ago, my house was broken into while I was home sleeping. Seriously a really horrible feeling that wont soon be forgotten.. but I can not imagine coming home to find this...
"Can I Borrow These Underwear ??"

I can't even imagine coming home, walking through the front door to a) found out your house has been broken into, muchless b) finding out that the guy is still chillin' in your house wearing your underwear like that is something normal that everyone does....? Who the heck would do such a thing??

So, let me get this straight...you break into a house, you hang out all day, shower, make sure to follow a strict skin care regimine, and even take it so far as to borrow a pair of skinnies from your victims lingerie drawer. And then just went you don't think it could anymore odd...You proceed to "drop the kids off at the pool" in her bathroom and refuse to get up from the shitter until you are finished with your toilet business. That's just f*cking odd!

What makes this story even better is that it took place in the lovely ancient retirement community of Ocala, Florida. (Editors note: Ofcourse it would have to be from Florida.) Just another really stupendously flattering reason for our sunshine state to make the local 5'o'clock news all over the nation. Awesome.